Troubles and Problems.

I never understand why my parents ACT good in front of people but the back...scold me,curse me and look down on me...Everysingle thing i do like dance and cheerleading for church,they dint praise me but look down on me,in football they said i am useless...other people can sure beat you...basketball competition...they will say you sure lose...exams...your pathetic..

They destroy my hopes and dreams. They are the ones who made me the boy i am today. They will never understand me. My father is a CHRISTIAN,and what? He curses,scold me,even said before i am a fucking useless son. You know how that felt? I act as though i feel nothing..in my heart is full of hatred. My mother...will use cruel ways too torture me...BRAIN WASH MY FATHER not LETTING ME TO GO TOO YOUTH! I tried too hold my patients. But in my heart...I wanted too KILL HER i curse her...but i did not realize that my suffers are just so small...Outside people are waiting for death...in the hospital or civil wars..why my parents never understand me?

Mother judge church people so rich and take money from offerings...father said i am a useless christian...But look at themself...I rather not exist in this world than....YES MY SCHOOL EXAMS RESULTS ARE SHITS. I did fail! I tried but i really suck in History..what can i do about it??

My dad says that his gonna met my teacher and talk too her about my school works...just because i dint pass up my 4 books...they want too embarrass me in front of my friends...I dont fucking EMO about it but my heart is full of hatred...what can i do? How can you not be angry about it?

The girl i love and care soo much had a boyfriend now,everyday is like a prison in my life,AND WHAT? I act so normal...I want my brothers and sisters in christ too see me happy. Every smile and laughter can change a person day. I want too be there with them. I really hope GOD is watching and help me now. But God has no replies, He dont suddenly appear...why? No one could understand this world...this life...now i understand how some teenagers kill themself because people dont understand them.

Everyday people is dying and waiting for death...should i complain? No one understand them or me...everyone understands about their own problems. This is the fact of life.

17.APRIL.2010.

17.April.2010

Joey Chan's Birthday.

His the kind of person that you can really trust.His a genius in studies.His one of the smartest people in Petra Youth.It was his 21st Birthday.

John Lian bought a huge cake for Joey cost about RM 400+(I was stunned)

But Joey really help a lot for the group. His a silent worker. He did the most for the group. Really salute him!The first time i met him he was so silent,but now...change. This is the most happy part. As brotherhoods outings,every laughing and smile makes a person better =)

Well bro~Joey~You one heck of a buddy! Respect you the most! Not just because your smart but you can bare with one and another even through hard times! Your the man!